Hi! I'm Christian. There's a lot of really random stuff on here, but I promise, all of it is awesome. Here you will find things like manliness, video games, music, books, and, (sometimes) porn! Madness lies in this direction as well, but it's a comfortable madness. Come in, rest easy, and stay a while! (warning: as stated, this blog often contains nudity and pornography. If this offends you, keep scrolling until you're no longer offended. :P)I love questions. :)
The place inside had been his room. It was a mess. There was a large and battered wardrobe, and that was about the end of it as far as proper furniture was concerned unless you wanted to broaden the term to include a wicker chair with no bottom and three legs and a mattress so full of the life that inhabits mattresses that it occasionally moved sluggishly around the floor, bumping into things. The rest of the room was a litter of objects dragged in from the street - old crates, bits of planking, sacks …
Rincewind felt a lump in his throat. They’d left his room just as it was. Interesting Times (via fuckyeahrincewind)
The point is that descriptive writing is very rarely entirely accurate and during the reign of Olaf Quimby II as Patrician of Ankh some legislation was passed in a determined attempt to put a stop to this sort of thing and introduce some honesty into reporting.
Thus, if a legend said of a notable hero that ‘all men spoke of his prowess’ any bard who valued his life would add hastily ‘except for a couple of people in his home village who thought he was a liar, and quite a lot of other people who had never really heard of him.’ Poetic simile was strictly limited to sentences like ‘his mighty steed was as fleet as the wind on a fairly calm day, say about Force Three,’ and any loose talk about a beloved having a face that launched a thousand ships would have to be backed by evidence that the object of desire did indeed look like a bottle of champagne.
Quimby was eventually killed by a disgruntled poet during an experiment conducted in the palace grounds to prove the disputed accuracy of the proverb ‘The pen is mightier than the sword,’ and in his memory it was amended to include the phrase ‘only if the sword is very small and the pen is very sharp.’ Terry Pratchett, The Light Fantastic (via discworldquotes)